1 If you’ve never done it before, there’s no better excuse than a Pride Parade to slip into something slinky. ‘But being gay doesn’t mean I’m a woman’ I hear you say. That’s fine! Wearing a frock won’t change your gender but it could just get you in touch with the feminine side of your nature.
2 As gay men we have programmed ourselves away from anything, which on top of our wayward sexuality, might attract disapproval. Consequently, although our limp wristed, camp comedians are tolerated by society at large (if they are funny enough to be really laughed at!), the gender portrayal that we seem most comfortable with is that of the Straight Acting Male. What? You’re gay? You would never have guessed! So straight acting! Well done you! At the other end of the spectrum we have the screaming queen who seems to have no shame at the blatant portrayal of a feminine-like sexuality without so much as the slightest attempt to tone it down. Those who, over the years have been able to get away with it, have repressed and concealed any clue as to their true sexuality- often taking their macho caricature to an almost ludicrous and camp extreme. Those who don’t pass, often aggressively camp it up; attack being the best form of defence for them. But what are we scared about? Put something frilly on and celebrate that Anything Goes in 2012!
3 Wearing a dress can face us up to our internalised homophobia. Slip on those nylons and feel the discomfort. What’s wrong? What nasty taboo are you breaking? You are allowing yourself into a domain reserved for women and you’re boldly going where you as a man have not been before! You were told from an early age by parents, teachers and peers that any hint that a man might behave in a feminine way [like for instance fancying the pants off the boy sitting at the next desk] must be jumped on and annihilated at all costs.
4 And if we’re uncomfortable with being perceived as feminine-acting what’s so bad about that? How about facing yourself up to your internalized misogyny. We exist in a patriarchal society. We have subliminally incorporated our sense of superior male entitlement right into the core of our personalities to the extent that we are hardly aware of it. We might even deny its existence until we catch a glimpse of a high riding hemline in the mirror and we are horrified. You are flying in the face of all your programming by blatantly disregarding the eleventh commandment: ‘Thou shalt not behave like a sissy’. Enjoy the subversion. Stand in solidarity with yo’ sistas and become an Effeminist!
5 ‘But what if people get the wrong idea and think I’m a tranny?’ Good! Let them think you have trans issues and enjoy their squirming disapproval. Feel the depth of your own internalised (or overt) transphobia and learn to love your inner girlie persona. Feel the danger of creating an ambiguous gender portrayal in the presence of people who might erupt into violence when faced with anything other than a simple gender binary. Buy some daring red lippy from Boots and get a girlfriend to do your nails in a nice sparkly pink shade.
6 ‘But I don’t look any good in a dress!’ Get over yourself. You clearly haven’t looked hard enough to find THAT dress. When you find it you will be transformed into the Belle of the Ball! And always remember the three golden rules for looking absolutely fabulous: Accessorize! Accessorize! and Accessorize!
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